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April 22

“We are sex addicts.”

Sex Addicts Anonymous, page 1

As I read this stark, bold, introductory statement at the beginning of each meeting, I am both exposed and empowered. I want to stop after that first sentence and reflect, then perhaps pray… grant me the serenity to accept that I am a sex addict, that I cannot change this fact. Recently, while taking inventory, I realized I still had some pride in my sexual conquests, the same ones that brought pain, humiliation, shame, and destruction. I search my attitude even now as I read that sentence—may I never again delight in harmful behavior and attitudes.

Yet, do I feel intense shame, that somehow I am too broken and worthless because of this reality? No, this program moves me from shame to grace. So where is the grace in this statement?

I find grace in “we”—I am not alone. I am known and accepted. There are finally others in the world who get me. “We are”—I am who I am. I am human with limitations which happen to include sex addiction and associated character defects. I can accept myself as I am.

“Sex”—is a powerful aspect of my humanity. It can help me see my deepest needs and desires, connecting me to my spirituality.

“Addicts”—I am not in control. I need a Power greater than myself. I also need help from my fellow addicts. to make beautiful life music. I make the world better by practicing my daily recovery plan.

I find serenity to accept my reality today. I experience grace in this fellowship of sex addicts.