April 26

“We may experience abstinence from our inner-circle sexual behaviors as a gift from our Higher Power rather than as the result of our own white-knuckled efforts.”

Sex Addicts Anonymous, page 31

I know it’s tempting for some to put off committing fully to the program until they have a better understanding of it, but I’ve found I don’t have to know it all perfectly before I act. In fact, I can’t.

The founders of twelve-step recovery and our own Green Book both say that, in order to progress, we need to be willing to do whatever it takes to be sober. This spiritual program asks me to start walking forward even when I don’t know where I’m going or how I will get there. I can only choose to trust my Higher Power and those who’ve gone down this road, those who understand that it’s through the exercise of willingness and faith that we gain strength to grow beyond what we presently are.

Abstinence from addictive sexual behaviors allowed my body to reset, and eventually made it possible for my thinking to become clearer. One day at a time, in willingness and faith, I am given the strength to abstain from my inner circle behaviors.

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Today I choose to trust my Higher Power and the experience of those who have paved the way for me.