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Letting Go of Old Ideas

Distorted thinking is common among sex addicts.  We rationalize and justify our acting out.  We may be invested in seeing our behaviors as fun or as our birthright, without any sense of the harm we do to ourselves or to others.  We may resist the idea that we are sex addicts.

I need this to relieve tension… I’m not harming anyone by what I do… I need to play around before I settle down… sex is a form of liberation… it will be different this time… these days, every­one is into porn… just because I like a lot of sex doesn’t make me an addict…

Do not be dismayed if you resist letting go of some of your ideas.  This is a normal part of changing old behaviors and attitudes.  As we attend meetings and listen to the stories of others, we come to see the irrationality of our thinking.  In truth, this addiction is a condition that distorts our natural sexuality.

Over time, we come to see that we are not morally bad but that we have a disease that strikes without regard to gender, age, ethnicity, sexual orientation, or social or economic class.  We have a problem against which our best intentions and most valiant solo efforts are ineffective.  Our personal histories are living proof that willpower alone is not enough.  If we keep an open mind to what we hear and are willing to take guidance from sober SAA members, we eventually see the limitations of our old thinking.