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Rigorous Honesty
Rigorous honesty demands much more than what we wish to believe about ourselves and what we imagine others might want to hear. It takes courage and faith to tell the truth, especially when deceit and denial were a significant part of our acting-out patterns. Rigorous honesty is an element of all aspects of our program. …
Identify, Don’t Compare
When we first enter SAA, it can sometimes be tempting to compare our own behavior with that of others. When we concentrate on differences, imagining that their sexual conduct is much more (or much less) serious than ours, we make judgments that inadvertently reinforce our own denial. …
Progress, Not Perfection
Recovery can feel like a roller coaster. Sometimes it can seem like one step forward and two steps backward. Our progress may feel tentative. We may experience long plateaus in which it seems nothing is changing. If we relapse, we can feel terrible despair and hopelessness. …
Easy Does It
Many of us have lived our lives as if sex was the answer to everything and there was no such thing as enough. When we enter SAA, some of us have a tendency to turn the intensity that we experienced in our addiction toward our recovery. …
Live and Let Live
It is to be expected that from time to time, you will feel irritated with people both in and out of SAA. You may not agree with how they conduct their program or how they run a meeting. …
Asking Questions
Entering SAA may be a daunting experience. Out in the world in the midst of our addiction, we suffered alone; in recovery, we heal together. Having lots of questions is to be expected of a new member in SAA….
Feedback
Feedback from sober individuals is a vital part of our program. On our own, it is difficult to get perspective on how we conducted our sex lives. A fellow recovering addict provides us with a more objective view of where we have been and where we are. …
Outside Resources
At various times, all of us have made use of professionals outside of SAA. We have seen therapists, doctors, dentists, lawyers, financial advisors, vocational counselors, and many others….
Three Things a Day
Making a commitment to use the tools of SAA to stay sober can ground each day in the principles of the program. Attending meetings, staying in touch with our sponsor, prayer, meditation, program literature, and phone calls to SAA members are among the most widely used and are often considered the fundamental tools of SAA. …
Handling Travel
When travel requires us to leave the familiar comforts of home, friends, and meetings, even briefly, it is helpful to create a recovery plan. We can often anticipate particular challenges we may face. Prepare for your trip ahead of time with your sobriety in mind. …